/sigh — I feel inadequate

My friends mean the world to me, I am blessed to have so many of them. I am really grateful for their friendship, their love and their support. When I have a rough day, someone will notice and try to comfort me. When I doubt myself, someone is there to cheer me up.

You see, my friends’ opinions mean a great deal to me. I have, from the very beginning, wanted people to like me and cherish the time they’ve spent with me. I want to leave nothing but a good impression with them, and have them become my friends.

A friend of mine said something that really hurt my feelings the other day. So much, in fact, that I began to question if I’m at all competent enough to write this diary. If I’m remotely adequate to make a book for my friends. I’ve never been very confident in my writing, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise how much it hurts when a friend makes you feel that what you are doing isn’t good enough.

I know my spelling is off, my sentences could use a lot of work and my vocabulary is rotten. Comments like that, even if they are meant to help, hurts me and makes me even more insecure about my writing.

/cry

In the end I was so hurt—so upset—that I couldn’t bring myself to do a KS99 run with my linkshell.

Where was Kimiko anyway?

I will dedicate the first entry in my diary to recap some of my adventures in these past months. Because it has been such a long time since some of these things took place, I thought it would be better not to use the actual dates.

So, the question some of you may have been asking yourselves is “where was Kimiko anyway?” Well, I’ve been around. Very much alive, and very much kicking! Although some of my achievements may look bland in comparison to some of the other members of the adventurer community, I’m still quite happy with my progress. Sure, there are places I’d like to go and items I have yet to obtain, but I’ve still managed to have a blast.

I once set myself the goal of getting my very own Cleric’s Briault. I have been doing dynamis for quite some time, and it finally paid off. Dynamis has always been one of my favorite activities, both because of the items that drop, but also the people you get to work with. The cheer work required to successfully complete a Dynamis run is reason enough for me to keep on working. It’s a joy to do my very best to help others progress toward their own goals, and in the end also reward them with their very own relic piece.

Cleric's Briault, mine!

Lately I’ve been put in charge of handling attendance and handing out items that drop. It’s a task I take with great pride, respect and honor. I’m really happy that the linkshell’s leaders have enough faith in me to let me help them out. This way they also get to focus on actually leading the run, instead of keeping track of all the lists.

Some of the people I’ve met throughout my adventures may remember me saying «I will never ever become a Black Mage» countless times. The job ended up enticing me enough to level it in the end. It’s a fun job, although a quite demanding job to be honest. It requires knowledge of the location, monsters and elements. Seeing a big nuke land can be quite satisfying, but I’m still new to the job so I have a long way to go before I can call myself a decent Black Mage.

Kimiko the Black Mage

Shortly after hitting level 72, my linkshell invited me to come as the only Black Mage. I was both psyched and anxious at the same time. My very first run with the linkshell as a Black Mage, and I was alone too! Luckily it wasn’t too difficult to get to the top floor, but guess who had been waiting to get slaughter me once I got up there?

Taking a short break

None other than Kaiser Behemoth himself was the last of the enemies we had to defeat to clear the area. I ended up grabbing hate and kiting the whole run, letting the Red Mages and Scholars damage it over time till it fell over. It was quite a demanding task to kite it around, luckily I’m quick on feet so it didn’t get to hurt me!

And while speaking of big beasts… I’ve picked up Nyzul Isle Investigation lately, an activity I really enjoy. I’m hoping to get my paws on some Askar and Goliard pieces in the future for my various jobs, but because I only go once a week I’m still nowhere near getting those pieces I’m afraid. Oh, and Denali is such a purrrdy set! (^^=)

The big beast

My Paladin has come a long way as well since I last got to sit down and write in my diary. I have obtained a few shiney items, including a full valor relic set and a Joyeuse.

Kimiko the Knight

Lately I have been focusing on leveling back line parties. While my goal is to level Red Mage and Scholar, I have picked up my instruments these past few weeks and slowly but surely working my way up as a Bard. It’s a job I hope can help me build up a strong merit base for my other jobs. But, although Bard is the easy way out of getting merits, I still feel that I could use the experience of leveling my other jobs so I can improve myself.

Singing along!

I have still got a long way to go before my Black Mage is where I want it, but I’m hellbent on getting there soon. Guess that means I need to work diligently and study hard to master the ways of a sorcerer. Having said that I’m also planning to release a few trrreats that can help others do the same!

Exploring

So, that’s some of the many things I’ve been doing these past few months. I’ve still got a long way to go, and I hope I may end up meeting some of you along the way! Thank you for reading!

A new chapter

<<< Welcome to Unicorn! >>>

Nyaa~! Welcome to my new diary, The Furball, where I will be recording all of my adventures. When I first started blogging about my adventures in 2005, I hoped to show other people the amazing things that Vana’diel has to offer. I wanted to show them the things they can do, places to go and the really nice people you get to meet along the way.

Welcome!

Some of you may know me from my previous diary by the same name. Quite some time have gone by without much writing I’m afraid, and this new diary will mark the beginning of a new chapter — literally! My new diary will have several posts a week, and I hope you will keep reading my diary! Oh, and please, please, leave some delicious fishies for me if you like my stories! (^^=)

I have many exciting things in the work, including a new community website which will be announced in the next day or two, a book and some iPhone projects.